Friday, July 25, 2008

Across the Pond: American vs. British Women

I have a soft spot in my heart for the United Kingdom. I attended primary school for a short while in Edinburgh and still have family in London. I was a passenger in my first Ferrari ride (a GTO) in London, and the chocolates and sweets are incredibly richer and better than in the States. Of course, I think British women are wonderful as well. But an article disputes that point, and it is so hilarious and so different from the politically-correct publications we have in the U.S., I had to share:

Initial salvo (Tad Safran): [Apologies--link has expired.]

[T]he girl giving the [beauty] advice actually did think her friend looked adorable and it was simply like one cannibal asking another if it’s wrong to eat human flesh. Ultimately, English women are like men doing DIY. No matter how lost they are, they refuse to call in professional help.

A perfect example of this was presented to me last week. I was set up with Sophie (I have changed the name) by married friends. Sophie was a truly beautiful girl I used to be friends with, but hadn’t seen in 15 years. I was surprised to hear that she was still single and was excited to meet her again. At dinner, I found myself sitting opposite something that surely would have been happier hunting for truffles in the forests of France or grazing on the grassy marshlands of Canada... 

It’s not entirely Sophie’s fault, I suppose. My friend’s wife didn’t manage my expectations. Maybe it would have been better if she had said: “Tad, you enjoyed The Lord of the Rings. Would you like to meet an orc?”


Follow-Up (with extra shovel): [Apologies--link has expired.]

Women of Britain: Bridget Jones’s Diary is not a documentary. It’s a work of fiction, a fairytale. The fact is that control-top granny pants are simply not a substitute for regular exercise, thoughtful grooming and a healthy diet.

Follow-Up from the Gentler(?) Sex:

I miss the U.K. sometimes. "Femur-sized Toblerones" just can't find that kind of acerbic writing anymore. If it weren't for the NY Times, the LA Times, and the Washington Post, Americans would be in danger of having no daily newspapers designed for an audience above a tenth-grade reading level. Sigh.

As for Tad Safran, he is writing at least partially tongue-in-cheek. He's smart enough to know if a woman can't figure out he's joking or laugh at herself a bit, he's probably better off without her.

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